Definitely! I'm able to work (slowly, but surely) on finishing my degree from home by taking online classes. Also, it's much easier to write papers and help the kids with their papers now that the public library has so much in an electronic form.
My poor kids are frustrated because their school has an online gradebook that teachers update each week (and I dutifully check each week). Parents are able to see missing assignments and bad grades as well as teacher comments (if any).
My poor kids are frustrated because their school has an online gradebook that teachers update each week (and I dutifully check each week). Parents are able to see missing assignments and bad grades as well as teacher comments (if any).
Where do I begin? I have NO motivation today - not even a teensy, tiny little sliver of something that would almost pass for motivation. This is becoming an ongoing problem. I know that I have approximately 10 bajillion and 4 things to do right at this very moment (I do know the exact amount!!). Why am I not able to get started on these projects?
Procrastination and coffee - my lifelines. I will most likely wait until the last possible moment and then stress out over making deadlines. I do this to myself ALL the time! Is there any solution? I'm thinking - probably not. I have a job that I kind of like, but don't love. A job that is not a career for me, but a job that helps me pay bills and stuff. It is just something that sucks up a ton of my time and energy that has somewhat of a benefit (insurance and a paycheck).
Is this where I want to be for the rest of my life? I'm not sure. I certainly don't want to be a glorified secretary forever! When I was a little girl, I never went to career day dressed as a secretary. What to do, what to do?? Well, for now, I should probably quit writing and begin some work in earnest. I believe that I could complete a great deal in the next few hours - IF I can bear to stay focused for the next several hours. I can do this, I can do this - I know I can, but do I REALLY want to? Answer: No, I don't really want to. Do I need to? Answer: I definitely need a paycheck.
Well, here goes...let's see how much I can accomplish. Maybe I'll keep score! How many documents can I complete within the next hour or so? Let's find out!! :)
Procrastination and coffee - my lifelines. I will most likely wait until the last possible moment and then stress out over making deadlines. I do this to myself ALL the time! Is there any solution? I'm thinking - probably not. I have a job that I kind of like, but don't love. A job that is not a career for me, but a job that helps me pay bills and stuff. It is just something that sucks up a ton of my time and energy that has somewhat of a benefit (insurance and a paycheck).
Is this where I want to be for the rest of my life? I'm not sure. I certainly don't want to be a glorified secretary forever! When I was a little girl, I never went to career day dressed as a secretary. What to do, what to do?? Well, for now, I should probably quit writing and begin some work in earnest. I believe that I could complete a great deal in the next few hours - IF I can bear to stay focused for the next several hours. I can do this, I can do this - I know I can, but do I REALLY want to? Answer: No, I don't really want to. Do I need to? Answer: I definitely need a paycheck.
Well, here goes...let's see how much I can accomplish. Maybe I'll keep score! How many documents can I complete within the next hour or so? Let's find out!! :)
- Current Mood:
restless - Current Music:Photograph by The Verve
Some days, the moment is just right. You are in the middle of going about business as usual. Then, you stop and stare off into space. The last 10-15 years flash before your eyes. Just as suddenly, you are back to the task at hand. Nothing has changed, yet the wheels are turning.
I just can't figure out how I got from point A to point B. I mean, I love my family, I like my house, my job is a decent paycheck, but how?? What happened?? I remember that girl from 10 years ago. She had hopes and dreams and desires. Wow!! She was going places. Now, those places have gone. Life has moved on and here I am. I realize that I am no longer that girl. In fact, I am glad to no longer be that girl. She was young and naive and so incredibly insecure. While I still keep a few of those insecurities handy, I am a much stronger person than I ever dreamed I could be. I am much less invincible, but more secure. My life is my own and I can recall each and every choice that led me to where I am.
Choices - that's what I tell my kids each day. Life is a series of choices and nothing more. We choose our future. We can make bad, terrible, awful and horrible choices. That is always an option. I also remind them that we can't go back and "undo" those choices. What we can do, though, is look ahead and learn from our experiences. We can make a new choice and attempt to reconcile ourselves to the poor decisions that we've made. We assure ourselves that each bad decision was a life lesson that we needed to learn. Is this always the case? I don't think so. Sometimes, I know very well what I should do or what I should say. I do not always follow through. It can be fun to make bad decisions and some people have made a living out of it. It isn't who I want to be, though.
What do I do now? Do I sit here and feel sorry for myself and think about how life has passed me by? Or do I decide that I am going to make changes and things will be different?? I have no idea. I don't know what I want to do and I don't know what I will do. I only know that I am tired and my sleepy cat is making a nap look awfully appealing at the moment. I think I'll join him.
I just can't figure out how I got from point A to point B. I mean, I love my family, I like my house, my job is a decent paycheck, but how?? What happened?? I remember that girl from 10 years ago. She had hopes and dreams and desires. Wow!! She was going places. Now, those places have gone. Life has moved on and here I am. I realize that I am no longer that girl. In fact, I am glad to no longer be that girl. She was young and naive and so incredibly insecure. While I still keep a few of those insecurities handy, I am a much stronger person than I ever dreamed I could be. I am much less invincible, but more secure. My life is my own and I can recall each and every choice that led me to where I am.
Choices - that's what I tell my kids each day. Life is a series of choices and nothing more. We choose our future. We can make bad, terrible, awful and horrible choices. That is always an option. I also remind them that we can't go back and "undo" those choices. What we can do, though, is look ahead and learn from our experiences. We can make a new choice and attempt to reconcile ourselves to the poor decisions that we've made. We assure ourselves that each bad decision was a life lesson that we needed to learn. Is this always the case? I don't think so. Sometimes, I know very well what I should do or what I should say. I do not always follow through. It can be fun to make bad decisions and some people have made a living out of it. It isn't who I want to be, though.
What do I do now? Do I sit here and feel sorry for myself and think about how life has passed me by? Or do I decide that I am going to make changes and things will be different?? I have no idea. I don't know what I want to do and I don't know what I will do. I only know that I am tired and my sleepy cat is making a nap look awfully appealing at the moment. I think I'll join him.
- Current Mood:
cynical
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